1. Trans dyke blues

They gave her a canvas.
And asked her to paint.
Down in her head,
In her sacred profanities,
she saw someone.
She painted them.
          Them, in each others hands.
In their small home.
Home.

She grew flowering vines around the painting.
She grew, flowing into that girl she drew
She grew, wilted, regrew, rewilted

Joyful, playful, holy, insane
A little bit of un-sacredness
yet sacred the same.

2. Ode to a night of aching arms

That one night in peak Delhi summer
We talked all night on the phone
You were restless about your bass tone
My hands ached from holding the phone, till
6 AM  in the morning.

I didn’t mind.

Delhi is approaching winter, my love.

My pen aches to write for your bass.
My hand aches to ache,
holding the phone till
6AM in the morning
Again.

3. Sabr… dear heart…sabr

This Eid
There is no waking up to shower at 4, cold.
There is no riding with 5 people on a
motorcycle.
There is no table with banana leaves on,
covered in beef biryani.
There is no rush to the eidgaah.

Here I sit,
in my tattered cargos and corduroy jackets,
Couple of tears on my cheeks
Reminiscing the eids gone

Can the transsexual Eid?

For Us

I was lost
under what they said about me.
I wore all their words,
weighing more than my bones,
carrying them everywhere I went.

I couldn’t find myself
beneath those dirty fingerprints.
It was not me I saw
in the mirror, but I found
myself for you, for me, for us.
I pierced through the sun
to burn it all and to
come to you as I am.

We’ll meet under the moon
while the night clouds
float through my hair.
I’ll hold your hand
and nothing will weigh me down
while I fly in your love.

Author Notes:  My poetry book is a compilation of heartfelt verses that I’ve penned over the past few years, originally meant solely for my personal solace. However, after concealing my thoughts and emotions for an extended period, the yearning to step into the light became undeniable. I aspired to reveal my true self authentically. This petite yet significant book represents a vital aspect of my being, and unveiling it to the world fulfils the desire to be acknowledged for who I truly am. Moreover, my passion for sharing art further motivates me to extend this creative endeavour beyond the confines of my own contemplation. I invite you to explore my art, as I embrace the courage to be seen.

Boy from The Poems was published in December 2023 on Notion Press.

The following are reflections of -Ruby Almeida, Indian-origin queer activist, and chair of  LGBT+ Catholics, Westminster, UK.

“The news that Pope Francis has approved blessings for same-gender couples … is nothing short of wonderful for those many couples in committed relationships… The idea, not to say practice, that a loving and committed same-gender couple could deserve a blessing in their faith and from the Church that they love so much, has been a struggle for the Church for far too long.

Following on the recent announcements about LGBT+ access to, and involvement in, Baptism & Confirmation celebrations, the Church is taking another small step towards the radical inclusion of LGBT+ people of God… This is a massive step forward in the recognition and acceptance of all who seek a blessing for their loving and committed relationships.”

“We know that around the world our community face much violence and rejection by their communities and by their Church leaders. They cannot even live a life of knowing what it is like to be be loved by a partner, for fear of their lives. Therefore, this blessing, this aspiration that we all have is but an unachievable dream for many. But to dream is to hope. We pray that this dream, this blessing will be something that they will one day be able to have.”

Image and text courtesy Ruby Almeida. The content is from two media releases, that of the Global Network of Rainbow Catholicss of which Ruby is a media officer, and of the  LGBT+ Catholics Westminster, of which she is the Chair.

The context of the petitioner is as follows: Prasanna, a 34 y.o. cis gay man in Chennai, faced a health emergency requiring hospitalisation during the second wave of COVID, in 2021.  However, his partner of over 15 years was not recognised as a family member. As a result, Prasanna was forced to travel to the neighbouring district (where his natal family resided) to seek emergency care there. Based on this and other instances of exclusion and discrimination, Prasanna prayed for recognition of his partner through contract law, specifically the Deed of Familial Association, proposed the same year by Prof Tiju Thomas in the Law School Policy Review. The petition was impleaded in the Sushma hearings of Madras High Court and heard by Justice Anand Venkatesh on Nov 17, 2023.

The Madras High Court has asked for the Tamil Nadu government to consider this proposal, and for it to be included in the state LGBTQIA+ policy currently being drafted,  The Interim Order draws attention to the Supriyo judgement and asks that the DFA be in consonance with the ratio of the judgement, focusing on ways to ensure (only) Article 21 – which includes the right to relationships –  is protected through the mechanism of a DFA.

Media coverage follows

My friend made sure I got a seat, and the bus was relatively empty. I spotted a seat next to a guy who greeted me with a smile. I placed my bags there and started chatting with my friend. As the bus set off, I moved to sit beside the guy.

Soon after, I began sneezing, and the guy remarked, “It’s good you didn’t get a seat on that A/C bus.” I was taken aback and asked how he knew. He said, “I overheard your conversation with your friend.” We both chuckled, and he offered me a balm, which I found surprising coming from a stranger. As I sniffed it out, he reassured me in Malayalam, saying, “Enik kushta rogam onum illa,” roughly meaning “I do not have leprosy.” We both laughed again, breaking the ice.

Introductions followed; he was Dileep from Thrissur, with an MSW from Trivandrum, currently working. He was traveling from Aluva to Trivandrum for a meeting the next day. We quickly formed a friendly bond.

During the journey, he observed a lot about me and my life. Dileep sensed a pain in my eyes and predicted that I would open up before my stop at Kayamkulam. He believed this would change my life and give me new hope.

As we conversed, I found comfort in sharing personal stories about my breakup, the loss of my father, and my family. This moved him, and he held my hands, providing a shoulder to lean on, where I even dozed off for a while.

His words, though initially a lecture, began resonating with me. He encouraged me to concentrate on myself and work on my wishes. There was an unspoken connection, a sense of trust building between us.

Time flew by, and with an hour remaining, I wished for some bus malfunction, just to have a few more minutes with Dileep. His unexpected question, “Are we getting closer?” caught me off guard. I confessed, and he believed we were a perfect match. He asked if we could date, to which I couldn’t say no but needed time to decide.

Curiosity led me to ask if he was gay, seeking an honest relationship. He smiled, evading a direct answer. As I prepared to disembark, he declined to exchange numbers, saying, “Let’s love without numbers.” This left me feeling both tense and anxious.

I was really frustrated.

I was feeling tense because, honestly, he was a complete stranger. I barely knew him, and his sudden remarks were really getting to me.

He agreed to take my number but insisted on memorising it. That made me upset again. I suggested he just type it in, but he was dead set on learning it by heart.

He asked for my number and started to memorise it in front of me. I was nervous because he was making mistakes. But surprisingly, he managed to learn it and repeated the number several times. I thought he’d save it when I got off. However, I was still anxious, so I scribbled my number on my bus ticket and handed it to him. He refused to take the paper, saying, “Amal, not everyone’s the same. Let go of the past; I’ll be waiting for you.”

As we approached the Kayamkulam KSRTC bus stand, my heart raced faster than ever. I asked Dileep when he would call. He said, “Sharp at 8 PM on March 1st.” He wanted a straightforward answer from me—YES or NO.

When I asked for his number, he said he’d call before 8 PM on March 1st if he was alive. That got me angry. I retorted, “What if you can’t call me before 8 PM on March 1st?”

He responded, “Then, consider me dead.”

The bus stopped at the stand, and I got off. I asked Dileep to let go of my hand as I had to leave. He said, “Amal… Don’t worry about anything because I won’t let you cry anymore.” He whispered, “I LOVE YOU” in my ear. Stepping off at the bus stand, I started to feel better. I had a good time and, just as he predicted at the start, I felt a new sense of hope reaching my destination. He became that hope.

Returning home, I contemplated his proposal, seeking advice from friends who suggested that if he was genuine, I should say yes. I mentally prepared to accept, eagerly anticipating his call. But days passed without any communication and I began to wait. Every time I received a missed call on my number, I dialled back, hoping it would be him.

March 1st arrived, the day Dileep had promised to call. I returned to Kochi and settled in my room, eagerly anticipating his call. I switched my mobile to general mode, glanced at the clock—it was 7:58 PM, just two more minutes to go. I closed my eyes and started waiting for his call with my fingers crossed. When I opened my eyes slowly, it was already 8:01 PM, signalling that I should no longer wait for his calls. I prayed for it but, sadly, the call never came till date. I tried tirelessly to find him on social media and through contacts in his area but in vain. His absence left me questioning his sincerity.

I couldn’t deny that he had alleviated my depression to some extent during that journey, and his impact lingered in my thoughts. I sometimes wonder if he was just a dream or an imaginary figure, yet his words brought me comfort amid my despair.

Despite the uncertainty, I have come to accept that Dileep’s brief presence had a profound effect on me, teaching me invaluable lessons. His voice, face, and smile are all I can recall, and in a way, he succeeded in reaching depths where psychologists had failed.

The lingering question remains—will he ever return? Uncertain. Will he read this? Doubtful. Nevertheless, life must move forward, clinging to the glimmers of virtue that remain.

• This story has been republished from Amal’s blog with the author’s consent.
• Names have been changed
• Image supplied by the author, courtesy Pinterest.

Background

Transgender men/ trans men / men of trans experience are persons who were assigned female at birth by parents/medical professionals based on their genitalia, but who grow up to identify as men.

In India, the term ‘transgender person’ is predominantly associated with trans women and persons from socio-cultural identities like thirunangais, hijra and kinnar persons, etc. by the larger society. As a result, trans men are not even seen as transgender persons by government officials and policymakers, leading to a neglect of the specific issues that affect us.

Transgender men such as ourselves face multiple struggles when it comes to revealing our identity. We have to navigate oppression from patriarchal structures based on our sex assigned at birth, as well as discrimination and violence throughout our lives, based on our gender identity as trans men. This restricts our mobility, access to public spaces, education, employment, healthcare, civil rights (for example, inheritance, parental rights) and causes us to face violence even from our birth/natal families, and other institutions.

We face homelessness due to lack of support and frequent violence from family and society. Further, we face discrimination and violence in accessing public places, education, employment opportunities, social security, housing, healthcare, mobility, etc. Thus, most of us are forced into taking up menial jobs for our sustenance.

Right to Life, Right to Equality

Articles 14, 15, 19 and 21 of our Indian Constitution have given us the Right to Equality, Right not to be discriminated against on grounds of sex which is inclusive of one’s gender identity as well (NALSA verdict citation AIR 2014 SC 1863), Right to Expression, Right to Life. The moment our parents and siblings learn of our gender identity, the family, which is supposed to be a safe haven becomes the first place of violence for many of us. We are often forced into marriages by families and further subjected to conversion therapy, sexual violence including rape, domestic violence by families and society at large. Not many survive this violence: there is history of suicide by trans men who are unable to cope with the violence. So as trans men we are not able access most of the rights specified in our Indian Constitution.

Right to Education

Right of Children to Free and Compulsory Education Act or Right to Education Act (RTE) describes the importance of free and compulsory education for children between 6 yrs and 14 yrs in India under Article 21a of our Indian Constitution. However, children who are assigned female at birth and do not conform to societal gender norms, are forcibly married off to men, some of us as young as 14.

If we resist the efforts of our families to get married, we are subjected to cruelty, rape, violence, abuse and conversion therapy that hinders our access to education and we are forced to drop out of schools.

Even those of us who have access to educational institutions, find them to be spaces of violence, bullying and abuse because of our gender expression or identity. This violence in educational institutions causes us to drop out, hence restricting our education access, and further opportunities to economic empowerment for which education is essential. Also there is no horizontal reservation, which will enable the inclusion of persons who are further marginalized among us on the basis of caste towards education access.

Right to Work

Article 16(2) of Indian Constitution states that no citizen can be discriminated against or be ineligible to work based on grounds of sex which can be interpreted as based on gender identity as well. National Rural Employment Guarantee Act 2005 requires the state to make provision for secure human conditions of work, whereas in reality trans men are harassed at work because of our gender identity.

There are no anti-discrimination policies, inclusive internal committee,inclusive redressal policies, inclusive single stalled gender neutral restroom access in workplaces. Also there are no trans-inclusive labour laws and gender-disaggregated statistics that take into account trans men and trans women in the labour force.

Also, the lack of educational qualifications forces many of us enter the unorganized labour force, where there are no protections.

In recruitments to police and other armed forces, trans men are forced to compete against cis men’s standards in physical tests without considering the fact that trans men and cis men have different physiological/physical capacities. Such standards render it impossible for trans men to get fair and equitable opportunities to access public employment.

Right to Health

Article 21 of the Indian Constitution guarantees the fundamental right to life and personal liberty which includes the right to health. Articles 38,39,42,43 and 47 put the obligation on the state in order to ensure the effective realization of the right to health.

Trans men require multiple speciality professionals like gynecologists, endocrinologists, dermatologists, among others. Trans men who need to access sexual and reproductive health (SRH) services are often forced to go to gynecologists who do not understand the basic difference between sex and gender, and fail to understand how a male-identifying and masculine-presenting person would need hysterectomy, have menstrual issues, be at risk for ovarian, cervical and/or breast cancer, need fertility preservation, obstetric, or medical termination of pregnancy services.

Additionally, we are often subjected to physical examination by medical professionals to even issue a letter of gender incongruence/dysphoria. These physical examinations are unnecessary, and violate our bodily autonomy, privacy and right to self-determination.

We also face difficulties in accessing hormones, surgeries and gender affirming procedures.We face issues of medical negligence, neglect, lack of expertise and ignorance in gender affirming procedures like hormone therapy, surgeries as well as in accessing general healthcare, because of which some transgender persons have even lost their lives.

We urge community members, service providers (health, education, livelihood, legal) and policy professionals to understand the issues specific to trans men as well as cross-cutting issues, in order to ensure truly inclusive services and policies.

We urge that diverse community representation be ensured in consultations for policy development.

Till about fifty years back, all over the world, many believed that homosexuality is a disease and can be treated. It was even listed in the official classification of diseases in various countries. In 1973 however, the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual (DSM) which is the official classification of diseases in the United States removed homosexuality from the list. The WHO followed suit after some years and removed it from its list of diseases called the International Classifification of Diseases (ICD). The message to the doctors world over including the psychiatrists was loud and clear; stop trying to treat homosexuality since it is not even a disease and that it is a normal variation of sexuality which is a spectrum rather than a single codified sexual behaviour.
However, many psychiatrists in India not only continued to believe that it is a disease but also continued to treat it with what they called ‘Conversion Therapy’ on hapless young men and women brought to them by desperate parents who would do anything to make their wards straight and ‘normal’.

Conversion Therapy (CT) was (and is!) a set of procedures crudely based on principles of Behaviour Therapy which posits that any behaviour which is rewarded gets repeated and any behaviour which is punished gets extinguished overtime. In a particularly dainty version of treatment, during the session, imagining sex with a person of opposite sex is followed by pleasant images or music and imagining a same sex person with sexual intent is accompanied with an aversive stimulus like a mild electric current. As late as 1983, Indian Journal of Psychiatry, the official Journal of Indian Psychiatric Society published a paper entitled, “Homosexuality: A Study of Treatment and Outcome”. Six ‘exclusively homosexuals,’ five males and one female between the ages of 19 and 30 were treated and “in five of them the therapy was successful”. The rewarding stimulus used was personal favourite music and the aversive stimulus was 50 volts current! The study was done at the AIIMS, New Delhi and was presented at the annual conference of Indian Psychiatric Society at Bombay. The paper can be read in full here-
https://ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3012326/pdf/IJPsy-25-235.pdf.

The practice however decreased over the years as the world including the Indian psychiatrists accepted the fact of normalcy of a wide variety of sexual behaviours including homosexuality. However desperate parents continued to approach psychiatrists and many psychiatrists including some very senior ones continued to believe that homosexuality is a disease and needs treatment.

In January 2014, the then President of Indian Psychiatric Society Dr. Indira Sharma at the annual conference of the Society, during her speech from the podium of the society said that homosexuality was un-natural, homosexuals made rest of the people uncomfortable and should seek psychiatric help. The talk was widely reported in the press [TOI article here]  countrywide brouhaha [see editorial footnote].

I happened at that time to be the Chairperson of Task Force on Mental Health Legislation of the IPS and wrote to the then President and the VP requesting for some action even a symbolic one against the outgoing President. When nothing like that happened, I resigned from the membership of the society. I received several concerned calls asking why was I doing it, was I gay! I replied, no, I was doing it because I was a scientist and medical science said homosexuality is normal and should be left alone.

Things improved some years later, particularly because of the vociferous stand by the younger psychiatrists. For the first time in 2018, under the leadership of one of the best Presidents so far, Dr. Ajit Bhide, the IPS came out with a clear position statement on its website, saying that since homosexuality is not a disease no treatment is necessary. What helped further clear the air was the Supreme Court judgement of 2018 de-criminalising homosexuality.

At the same time the adage ‘More things change, more they remain the same’ continued to apply. According to Mariwala Health Initiative as reported in 2022 by the Scroll, 80% of the queer persons still go through either faith healing or the equally mumbo-jumbo Conversion Therapy from psychiatrists.

So much so that the Madras High Court in June 2021, on the plea of a queer rights NGO, ordered that all forms of Conversion Therapy were to be treated as professional misconduct and asked the National Medical Commission and the Indian Psychiatric Society to take disciplinary action in each case reported.

In 2022, a queer rights activist Dr. Prakash Dandekar (a radiation oncologist and co-founder of Mumbai Seenagers), reported to the Indian Psychiatric Society the case of a psychiatrist from Maharashtra, who has a million followers on Youtube and is a practising proponent of ‘homosexuality needs treatment’ school of thought. The IPS asked its LGBT task force to enquire into it but according to a frustrated member of the enquiry committee, was ‘persuaded’ later by the seniors in the IPS not to take any action based on the specious argument that the videos on the Youtube were posted before the Madras High Court Judgement, totally ignoring the fact that those continued to run long after the said judgement was delivered and many say still do. What such protectionism by the IPS does is to nullify even some of the progressive steps taken by the society itself like supporting gay people’s rights to adopt children.

And it is no surprise that, as reported by Wire  on 14th July 16, 2023. under the heading,
“Lesbian Couple’s Harrowing Journey Shines Light on Continuing Dangers of ‘Conversion Therapy’ (and that is what triggered this post), a lesbian girl was admitted and forcibly medicated at parents’ behest, at a psychiatric hospital in Kozhikode, Kerala to treat her sexual orientation! What medicine it could be is beyond me because there is no medicine to alter sexual orientation. Many times, when asked, the rationalization given is that, they were just trying to treat depression which many of queers have. Of course, many of them are depressed but that is just because of the societal and family pressures and listening to them sensitively and some medication occasionally, is all that is required. That does not need involuntary admission and forced injections. I tell them just do what you would do if a person with O-ve blood group comes to you with depression. You treat the Depression but you never try to change his blood group just to mainstream him, because a) It is normal even if uncommon and more importantly b) it cannot be done.

And Dr. Indira Sharma continues to hold responsible positions in Indian Psychiatry Society, year after year including, the Advisor to the Task force on Human Rights(of all the things) in 2022 !

It is high time for Indian Psychiatry to get its act together and ask its members to accept the scientific fact that all genders and sexualities are normal and that there is nothing here to treat!

Footnote from the editors:

• For more information, see query sent to IPS at https://new2.orinam.net/indira-sharma-homosexuality/ and response by Prof.T.V.Asokan, then President,  at https://new2.orinam.net/indian-psychiatric-society-homosexual-not-mental-illness
• Also see open letter to Dr Dinesh Bhugra, World Psychiatric Society, in connection with Dr. Indira Sharma’s statements.
• Orinam’s letter to Dr Raju, then General Secretary, on his statement “the IPS… is working on finding out the majority opinion among psychiatrists regarding the classification and management of homosexuality.” is here.

May 3, 2023

To:
The Government of Tamil Nadu

Subject: MARRIAGE EQUALITY Report Summarising the Needs and Demands from the LGBTQIA+ Community in Tamil Nadu

Given the pendency of the marriage equality petitions before the Hon’ble Supreme Court of India, a meeting was conducted in Chennai on April 23, 2023, in which members of LGBTQIA+ groups such as Kattiyakkari, Nirangal Charitable Trust, Orinam, Queerbatore, SAATHII, Sahodaran, Tamil Nadu LGBTIQ Movement. Trans Community Kitchen (Chennai), Thozhi, and Trans Rights Now; and individual activists, lawyers, mental health professionals and academics were present. These groups and individuals are part of Tamil Nadu Rainbow Coalition, an informal network first established as the Chennai Rainbow Coalition in 2009 and subsequently expanded across the state.

An open discussion was had, and the following points are now being submitted to the Government of Tamil Nadu for its consideration, in the event states have an opportunity to make submissions before the Hon’ble Supreme Court.

• Introduction
• Marriage and its Benefits – Why does the LGBTQIA+ community require the social protection of marriage
• Can the existing personal laws be modified to include the LGBTQIA+ community?
• Notice Period Requirement in the Special Marriage Act
• A Step Forward in the the Future of Personal Laws – The Right to Chosen Family

1. INTRODUCTION:

1.1 The State of Tamil Nadu has granted legal recognition to the transgender community and has constituted a welfare board since 2008, six years prior the Supreme Court’s verdict in NALSA vs Union of India. In more recent times, the marriage between a transwoman and a man was held to be valid under the Hindu Marriage Act by the Hon’ble Madras High Court in Arun Kumar and others vs Inspector General of Registration and others. In the case of S. Sushma vs Commissioner of Police, the Hon’ble Madras High Court has examined the struggles faced by the members of the LGBTQIA+ community in detail, and has issued directions to various government authorities in order to ensure their protection and safety.

1.2 As a state that has historically recognised and supported members of the queer community both through policy reform, judicial pronouncements, and government directives and as a state that has brought about an amendment to the Hindu Marriage Act in the year 1968 to include suyamariyathai or seerthiruththa thirumanam (self-respect marriages) in the ambit of a Hindu marriage, Tamil Nadu’s position in this litigation should unequivocally be in support of marriage equality, and the rights of LGBTQIA+ individuals to be able to solemnise marriages irrespective of gender markers (M, F, T).

1.3 In the present batch of petitions before the Hon’ble Supreme Court of India (also referred to as “Marriage Equality Petitions” going forward) Tamil Nadu should support marriages both under the Special Marriage Act as well as under religious personal laws.

2. MARRIAGE AND ITS BENEFITS

2.1 Marriage is the most socially accepted social union between two adults. This has also been discussed in detail by the Petitioners in the Marriage Equality Petitions.

2.2 The State of Tamil Nadu also recognises this social protection given by marriage, and thus has marriage assistance schemes to assist daughters of poor parents, orphan girls, widows who remarry, widows daughter’s marriage and inter-caste married couples through the Dr. Dharmambal Ammaiyar Ninaivu Widow Remarriage Assistance Scheme, E.V.R. Maniammaiyar Ninaivu Marriage Assistance Scheme For Daughters Of Poor Widows, Annai Therasa Ninaivu Marriage Assistance Scheme For Orphan Girls, Dr. Muthulakshmi Reddy Ninaivu Inter-Caste Marriage Assistance Scheme.

2.3 An argument has been advanced by the Union Government that marriage is not necessary or important for the members of the LGBTQIA+ community, and that their fundamental rights are not denied because they are not able to get married. Restrictions within the existing matrimonial law framework were highlighted, and the submission of the Union Government can be condensed to – “They can exist in this country, but they cannot get married in the current legal framework, and this inability to get married is not a violation of their fundamental right”. This is an incorrect understanding of the law, and the requirements of this community. For a persecuted group who are more often than not asked to leave or are thrown out of their birth families and familial homes owing to the stigma associated with their existence, LGBTQIA+ individuals struggle to find their footing in society. They choose their families and they build their community. Living in as domestic partners does not stand on the same footing of marriage today. In the Hon’ble Supreme Court judgement of D.Velusamy vs D.Patchaiammal, it was held that even the protection under the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005 was only available to couples who are in a live-in-relationship if their domestic relationship “is in the nature of marriage”.

2.4 Thus, for the Union Government to gate-keep this institution, which by its very laws and policies gives rise to various benefits, is tantamount to deliberately depriving the LGBTQIA+ community- an already vulnerable portion of Indian society of the rights and benefits available to heterosexual people.

2.5 The importance of marriage as a social institution that gives rise to benefits, responsibilities, duties, and oversight by the status cannot be replicated through any other form of living arrangement or domestic partnership both in the Indian legal framework as well as the Indian cultural context. A short and non-exhaustive list outlining the protection offered by marriage includes:

Protection offered through Marital Status

• Unless both or one of the individuals to the marriage want to dissolve their union, nobody else can do it. This aspect is invaluable to members of a community who are frequently deliberately separated by birth parents in order to prevent their relationship from proceeding further.
• It is easier to find accommodation in rental houses as a married couple, than it is as unmarried people in India right now. This is extremely useful to members of the LGBTQIA+ community who are more often than not asked to leave their birth families, unable to find permanent jobs as their education certificates and identity proof is not immediately available to them, and they have to move from one place to another in search of employment
• The benefits of opening a joint bank account, purchasing life insurance with nominees as a spouse will now extend to the LGBTQIA+ community.
• The ability to take health related decisions and be the nominee of their partner in the case of emergencies will now extend to the LGBTQIA+ community. Hospitals and health care professionals all require either blood relatives or spouses to sign off on life-saving treatments and surgeries, and at present, this crucial benefit is not available to members of the LGBTQIA+ community, many of whose members are separated and cut-off from their birth families who refuse to accept their choices and a community where members are also at risk of sexually transmitted illnesses.
• In addition to providing security during the life-time of a couple, marriage also grants benefits that can make it easier to navigate through the death of a spouse such as compassionate appointment, the right to receive mortal remains, and makes it easier to execute a will or obtain a legal heir certificate to carry out formalities after the spouse’s death.

3. CAN THE EXISTING PERSONAL LAWS BE MODIFIED TO INCLUDE THE LGBTQIA+ COMMUNITY?

3.1 The Hindu Marriage Act uses the terms “bride” and “groom”. The Special Marriage Act uses the terms “persons”, “parties”, and in the declaration uses the terms “husband and wife”. The Christian Marriage Act uses the terms “persons”. Removing the gender barrier in terminology can happen if the words bride, groom, husband, and wife are replaced by the words persons and spouses.

3.2 The list of prohibited relationships can be merged and make way for one comprehensive list so that the concerns of the legislature about inter-familial marriages are met.

3.3 The legal age to marry can be modified to become 18 – the age of majority. This is particularly important for LGBTQIA+ persons as parents who identify that their children are gender-nonconforming at an early age try to get their children married off as soon as possible.

4. NOTICE PERIOD REQUIREMENT IN THE SPECIAL MARRIAGE ACT

4.1 The existing framework in the Special Marriage Act involves a notice period requirement that is unconstitutional. Following the notice intending marriage, details of the people intending to marry will be publicly exhibited in their respective jurisdictions. This can have devastating consequences for LGBTQIA+ individuals who have fled from their birth families, and risk confinement, institutionalisation, forced conversions, and even honour killing. The 30 day objection period is also a cause for concern, as the word objection is not defined, and anybody can object. The notice period will place already vulnerable and persecuted individuals at grave risk, and will cause many hurdles in implementing marriage equality among members of the LGBTQIA+ community.

4.2 Thus, the Tamil Nadu government should support declaring Section 5 and 6 of the Special Marriage Act as unconstitutional. Any rights granted to the members of the LGBTQIA+ community with respect to marriage under the Special Marriage Act regime cannot be implemented when the notice period clause is still in force.

5. A STEP FORWARD IN THE FUTURE OF PERSONAL LAWS – THE RIGHT TO CHOSEN FAMILY

5.1 While the right of LGBTQIA+ individuals to marry can definitely improve the quality of life of queer individuals and is the right step forward, the future of the community can only be safeguarded when they have the right to choose their families. Unlike cis-heterosexual relations where familial bonds are strong and regulate social conduct and life, many members of the LGBTQIA+ community are forced to leave or are thrown out of their birth families and their native villages/ community.

5.2 Legal recognition to chosen families, by granting ration cards, identity proof in the same address, protection to couples forced to flee natal families, rights to parenting and custody, inheritance, rights of chosen family members to make medical decisions, insurance, and extending government incentives and schemes that are given to other families can greatly benefit the community.

5.3 In addition to this, any change in law or policy would be incomplete without adequate sensitivity training being given to law enforcement agencies and other departments who come in contact with LGBTQIA+ individuals when they are at their most vulnerable. Hence, sensitisation programs to police and prison authorities, district and state legal service authorities, judiciary as per the order of the Madras High Court dated 07-06-2021 in Sushma and another vs Commisioner of Police and others is the need of the hour. The State of Tamil Nadu can rest assured that the signatories to this note, and community leaders at the grassroots level will render any assistance required to facilitate these programs.

Thanking you,

Representatives of
Kattiyakkari, Nirangal Charitable Trust, Orinam, SAATHII, Sahodaran, Tamil Nadu LGBTIQ Movement. Thozhi, and Trans Rights Now; and individual activists

தமிழுக்கு இங்கே கிளிக் செய்யவும்

Image credits: Gokul

A Report on the findings from a closed door public hearing on April 1, 2023
PDF report is available in
English | Hindi | Marathi | Bengali

Organised by PUCL and National Network of LBI women and Transpersons
17th April, 2023 The Supreme Court hearings in front of the five-judge Constitution bench headed by the Chief Justice of India (CJI) DY Chandrachud on Marriage Equality start tomorrow. These proceedings have generated a lot of interest all over the country and the world, but even more so has set many queer and trans hearts racing in multiple ways, and not similarly. It is with this precise moment in mind that PUCL and the National Network of LBI women and Transpersons are releasing this report to the public today.

This report is not about Marriage Equality, though the right to marry is one of the recommendations made by the panelists. But this report is very much about the lives of the queer and trans persons whose rights will be debated not just in the Supreme Court, but all around us, in the media, on the streets, in houses and where you have. The voice of the State has already become clear in the invocation of sanskar, sacrament, and such like in the defence of the cis and heterosexual marriage and family. There is a slew of voices all around defending the existing structures of families and opposing the right of not just queer and trans persons, but also inter-religious and inter-caste heterosexual couples to live as they desire.

This moment therefore, is as much about families, and not just about marriage. While the focus is on the demand for marriage equality for queer and trans folx, the legitimacy given to assigned families is as much under question. Chosen families and intimacies cannot be thought of without also looking at the reality of what assigned families do to their queer and trans children.
This report is about the families that are assigned to us and those that often are the biggest road blocks to being able to live the way we want to. The families that are supposed to be spaces of nurture, care and support, turn against their own children (often at very young ages), treat them with utter disregard and violence, and force them to conform to socially accepted ideas of what is “normal” without any regard to the individual’s dignity or personhood. Stigma and violence run deep within the space of these families that are assigned to us at birth (or adoption).

A closed-door Jan Sunwai or Public Hearing on Familial Violence on Queer Trans People was organised by the People’s Union for Civil Liberties (PUCL), along with the National Network of LBI (Lesbian, Bisexual, Intersex) Women and Trans Persons (The Network) to bring these concerns in to focus was held on April 1, 2023 before an eminent panel of judges, lawyers, academics and activists. 31 queer and trans persons testified in front of the panel. The focus of the testimonies was on the relationship with the assigned (natal) families and the various struggles that the testifiers had undergone to be able to live their lives.

Today we bring to you this report, Apnon Ka Bahut Lagta Hai, with the findings and recommendations of the Panel which comprised of: Retd. Hon Justice Prabha Sridevan, Chennai; Asif Iqbal, Co-Founder, Dhanak, Delhi; Divya Taneja, Special Cell for Women and Children, Mumbai; Kavita Krishnan, Feminist Activist, Delhi; Manjula Pradeep, Anti-Caste Feminist Activist, Ahmedabad; Mihir Desai, Senior Counsel, Mumbai; Paromita Chakravarti, Feminist Academic, Kolkata; and Veena Gowda, Feminist Lawyer, Mumbai.

The community and civil society organisations included in the Network are: Nazariya: Queer Feminist Resource Group (Delhi), Sappho For Equality (Kolkata), Sahayatrika (Thrissur), Orinam (Chennai), Raahi (Bengaluru), QT Centre (Hyderabad), Hasrat-e-Zindagi Mamuli (Mumbai), Vikalp Women’s Group (Vadodara), SAATHII (pan-India), and unaffiliated individuals.

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IN THE MEDIA: ARTICLES ASSOCIATED WITH THE JAN SUNWAI REPORT, THE PRESS CONFERENCE, THE BORAH  PETITION AND ADV VRINDA GROVER’S INTERVENTION
(most recent first)

1. Saranya Chakrapani. Indelible mark on psyche: new report reveals violence LGBTQ community faces from families.
   YourStory. May 1, 2023.
   https://yourstory.com/socialstory/2023/05/new-report-reveals-familial-violence-on-queer-youth-community
2. Rituparna Borah. Marriage Equality: Family Means Everything, But So Does Chosen Family.
   The Quint. April 28, 2023
   https://www.thequint.com/gender/chosen-family-queer-and-trans-persons-life-marriage-equality
3. Article 14. Our Own Hurt Us the Most: Familial Violence in India
   Youtube. April 27, 2023.
   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfr7lCbn10k
4. Namrata and Shreyashi. Marriage equality – petitions, pushback and politics.
   Varta. April 26, 2023
   https://vartagensex.org/2023/04/26/marriage-equality-petitions-pushback-and-politics/
5. Rajiv Shah. Queer, trans persons ‘testify’: Marital rape, forced marriage, threat of disinheritance>
   CounterView. April 26, 2023.
   https://www.counterview.net/2023/04/queer-trans-persons-testify-marital.html?m=1
6. Sayan Bhattacharya. Marriage equality: What good is symbolic recognition of one’s relationships sans rights?
   Down To Earth. April 25, 2023.
   https://www.downtoearth.org.in/blog/governance/marriage-equality-what-good-is-symbolic-recognition-of-one-s-relationships-sans-rights–88940
7. Namita Bhandare. Marriage equality: How the case impacts us all.. 
   Hindustan Times.  April 23, 2023.
   https://www.hindustantimes.com/ht-newsletter/htmindthegap23042023.html
8. Vivek Divan. Overlooked in the marriage equality conversation: The marginalised among LGBTQI community. Indian Express : April 20, 2023
   https://indianexpress.com/article/opinion/columns/overlooked-in-the-marriage-equality-conversation-the-marginalised-among-lgbtqi-community-8566506/
   
9. Pragya Singh. ‘Family Must Go Beyond Blood and Marriage’—Petitioner in Marriage Equality Case. NewsClick. April 20, 2023
   https://www.newsclick.in/family-must-go-beyond-blood-and-marriage-petitioner-marriage-equality-case
10. Chayanika Shah. In Marriage Equality Case, Queer and Trans Persons Assert Right to Define Family
    NewsClick. Apr 20, 2023
    https://www.newsclick.in/marriage-equality-case-queer-and-trans-persons-assert-right-define-family
11. Sabrang India. Our own hurt us the most: Familial violence in the lives of queer & Trans persons within marriage equality debates  Sabrang India. April 18, 2023.
    https://www.newsclick.in/marriage-equality-case-queer-and-trans-persons-assert-right-define-family
12. Mihir Rajamane. Petition Explained: Marriage Equality under the Special Marriage Act and Freedom from Violence by Rituparna Borah and others March 31, 2023.
    https://mihirxr.wordpress.com/2023/03/31/petition-explained-marriage-equality-under-the-special-marriage-act-by-rituparna-borah-and-others/
13. Anmol Arora. The petition you need to know about from the same-sex marriage hearings that start today LiveMint. April 18, 2023.
    https://lifestyle.livemint.com/relationships/it-s-complicated/the-petition-you-need-to-know-about-from-the-same-sex-marriage-hearings-that-start-today-111681805877468.html
14. Shreyashi Ray.Beyond Marriage Equality: Chosen families and the right to live our lives as we are.
    Vidhi Centre for Legal Policy. April 18, 2023.
    https://vidhilegalpolicy.in/blog/beyond-marriage-equality/
15. Poushali Basak. The Fight for Saving Queer-Trans Lives Is More Than Just Securing Equal Marriage Rights. The Wire. April 12, 2023.
    https://thewire.in/lgbtqia/queer-trans-deaths-equal-same-sex-marriage
16. TheNewsMinute.Marriage equality alone will not free queer persons from violent families: Civil society orgs. The News Minute. April 3, 2023.
    https://www.thenewsminute.com/article/marriage-equality-alone-will-not-free-queer-persons-violent-families-civil-society-orgs

My name is a spell
It can’t be held
In the mouths of oppressors
Reminiscent of territories
Of bodies, invaded
The database collects my name
But cannot understand it
Yet the database decides
Where I will go in this life

Life, is a series of borders
Built and policed by those
Without access to themselves
But if we can be sorted, ordered, owned
By walls, by data
Then so can they
Eventually, borders creep
But our inner worlds
Cannot be stolen, like land

Land is a source
Of our innate, ancestral power
The soil and water
That nourished my infant body
Lives on in me
Even here at the borderlands
Where my Tamil is broken
And our people
Indefinitely imprisoned

To be imprisoned for seeking safety
For fleeing a genocide
For escaping the erasure of language, culture
For leaving a broken country
For resisting the regime that broke this country
For being born in a country broken by Empire
For being ripped from our homelands
For sacrificing ever being home again, whole again
Is to be imprisoned for existing

Existing is not possible
Without building worlds
Made up of music
Sound and stillness
In frequencies their ears can’t hear
Our ‘selves’ are fluid
Complex, interwoven with ‘other’
And at the same time non existent
Not to be contained in 1’s and 0’s
The seeds of liberatory systems

Systems we live in
Could bend and break under
The pressure of presence
Of a stillness so deep
It feels close to death
Perhaps even colonisers could access
Their own stillness, could speak our names
If only they stayed quiet
Long enough to hear it

Notes:

• Dhakshayini read this poem at the 64th meeting of Orinam’s Quilt in Chennai on Jan 2, 2023.
• Image from Wikimedia Commons, courtesy Blogtrepreneur