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15 Comments

  1. Mothers are always known to stand by their children…but what you have done is beyond words Chhanda… I really hope your story inspires a lot of other mothers and parents who bow down to the societal pressures and traditions and don’t mind sacrificing their children for that… your son is really lucky and blessed to have you as his mother… thank you for sharing your story…

  2. I have only one word, one emotion, Respect. Parenting is a hard job, and many times we make mistakes. It takes a special person to admit it the way you have. God bless your son. The world needs people like him

  3. Such an inspiring piece. It is at the same time very poignant. I am glad that you are supportive of your son. I wish all the parents were like this and tried to understand their child even if he/she is not what you wanted them to be.

  4. It must have taken a lot of courage and determination for you to write all this so openly and honestly. My heart goes out to your son for all the pain, but also to you for loving him unconditionally!

  5. This poignant chapter of your life, touched my soul! Thanks for sharing this piece of your life with all of us and hope many more parents will be inspired.Blessings.

  6. Your son has shown maturity and wisdom on how to handle relationships. Hats off to him!
    I applaud you for taking the courage to write this beautiful article. Come what may, a parent’s support and love will give the ultimate strength to the child.
    Thank you for sharing your experience 🙂

  7. But sadly not all gays will have understanding parents. Parents are the support system for all physically and mentally disabled children. Will they live if these support systems are taken away from them? Same is the case with gays. Don’t expect the world to love them. (Duniya ke liye jitna unko nafrat karey utna kam hai.) Upon that if their only God given protection, their shield (parents) is taken away from them, then they will live till their minds are strong, slowly and surely depression sets in and their willingness to live dies before their physical death. Would it not be better for parents to kill their gay child whilst they are still young rather then disowing and abandoning them, to die every moment of their life. No God, no father, no mother, no legal rights, no social rights, no reiligious protection, no friends, no aspect of life, no hope, no love, no purpose and meaning to their lives and really no urge to live…gumnami ki zindagi aur gumnami ki maut and maut ke baad do boond ansu koyee giraye iski umeed bhi nahi…

  8. Truly amazing to the extent that I started crying in the first few para… Thanks to Tatal’s Maa and appreciate for her courage and accepting the drawbacks that she made during her son’s upbringing.

    Its a path breaking, and I feel so overwhelmed after reading it and not to forget emotional, also the way the sensitivity of this issue of homosexuality has been penned is really remarkable.

    I can vey well empathsize with Tatal n his Maa and truly understand the challehges that they have faced n may b still facing.

    P.S- Would love to meet u both some day 🙂
    Tk cr…!

    Thanks n Regards,
    Anikesh Roy

  9. Acceptance is not an overnight miracle. It’s a relentless tug-of-war between reason and love. And love enables. Thank you for writing your heart out, you have done a great service to people like me, who have come out to their parents but are yet to address the elephant in the room….

  10. Chhabi; What a nice article. He told me about him and I was surprised like you because in our family he is the first one.
    But this matter didn’t surprise me since we have been seeing these things here always.
    As a person Tatai is a wonderful (to us he is a boy) boy. He is mature
    and a loving person. I understand being parents both of you had to suffer a lot and also Tatai has been suffering tremendously from his childhood.

  11. Amazingly narrated. Feeling liberated!
    I personally feel that our liberation begins with our parents. No law, no policy: nothing else matters quite as much. Such understanding and acceptance gives us the strength and will to fight all odds and extricate ourselves from the whirlpool of negative emotion.

  12. Aunty – you are one awesome person. Your sons life is just a photocopy of mine. I am very very much the same person as him. He is so lucky to have an understanding mother like you. May God bless you and your family.

  13. I wish I could cry. But I am in office right now. All I can afford is wet eyes. If someone asks, I’ll tell them it was the brightness of the screen that made my eyes wet. But the truth is, it was the brightness of the love between your son and you. God bless you both.

  14. My eyes filled with tears reading this … the pain of the child through it all and that of the mother scared and worried to accept … hats off to the courage and honesty of the child … power to both !